On The Road with Dave

Three guys, one Irish, one English, and one Scottish, are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total", says the Genie.

The Scottish guy says, "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity." So, with a blink of the Genie's eye FOOM! the oceans were teaming with fish.

The Englishman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that no one will get in for all eternity." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye POOF! there was a huge wall around England.

The Irishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out."

The Irishman says, "Fill it up with water."


HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY FROM ON THE ROAD WITH DAVE

Labels: St. Patrick's Day

"O, the red rose may be fair,
And the lily statelier;
But my shamrock, one in three
Takes the very heart of me!"

--Katherine Tynan

Labels: St. Patrick's Day

"May your blessings outnumber
The shamrocks that grow,
And may trouble avoid you
Wherever you go."

--Irish Blessing

Labels: "Sunday Thoughts", St. Patrick's Day

"May the Irish hills caress you.
May her lakes and rivers bless you.
May the luck of the Irish enfold you.
May the blessings of Saint Patrick behold you."


--Irish Blessing

Labels: "Sunday Thoughts", St. Patrick's Day

I hope all are wearing green on this fine St. Patrick's Day, and in celebration of today, grab a mug of green beer and have a chuckle at a fine Irish joke.

Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking as if he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling, hisnose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he'swalking with a limp.

"What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.

"Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy."

That little fella, O'Conner?" says Sean. "He couldn't do that to you, he must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."

"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself.Didn't you have something in your hand?"

"That I did," said Paddy. "Mrs. O'Conner, and a thing ofbeauty she was, but useless in a fight."

Labels: St. Patrick's Day